Thinking Thursday: The incredible slow journey to losing weight
|What happens when I'm alone in a free virtual make over site. :) Photo on the left is from August 2015, the one on the left October 2015|
Facebook reminded me back on September 28th, that I started my new exercise regime back on that day a year ago. It's been a year of ups and downs, with more downs than ups until I had an epiphany.
When I was young, like many people, I didn't have a problem with my weight. By anyone's standards I was skinny and all was good. It wasn't really. After being told I was fat by a close friend of mine in High School, I started to do double the exercise sessions, and double the dance sessions. It didn't help. I was skinny, and curvy, 110lbs on a 5'1" frame wasn't by any means fat, but I still viewed myself as my friend did.
|Me at 20, university years|
So when I started university and I couldn't work out as much because of going to school full time and holding down a full time job, I became more depressed. Still, I wasn't nearly as overweight and people made it out to be. I remember being 125lbs, looking great, or at least feeling great, when my mother had a chat with my boss in the restaurant that I used to work. They both agreed that I had to lose weight and the job might help. I was crushed.
After that I had one of those fuck it moments, and stopped eating healthily. Worse, I stopped exercising at the university gym, the few hours I could squeeze in. I was still walking everywhere, and from that moment until two years later, even with all the walking, I put on 15 lbs.
By the time I got married in 1999, I was a size 11. I told myself that I would lose the weight. We were getting ready to move to London, a city where you have to walk around, and run to catch trains, I told myself, it was the perfect place for me to lose the weight. By the time we arrived in London I was close to 150lbs.
Two months later in August, I'd gone down to 138lbs, but I stopped my diet because I was pregnant. I went from 138lbs to 189 lbs whilst pregnant with my first son. I wasn't eating for two, I was feeding myself with comfort food, as I found myself far away from family, friends and home. It didn't help that I didn't have extra support back then. It was just my husband and I in London. No friends. I spent a lot of time alone, with my bump, walking as much as I could, as I tried to get some sort of control over my eating habits.
After my son was born, I lost the weight, and went down to 145lbs. I was happy that I could squeeze myself in my pre pregnancy jeans, however, that didn't last long. Even though I was walking everywhere, I was eating way too much. It took two years for me to realize that my weight had ballooned again.
I was around 160lbs when I started my journey with Weight Watchers. In little to no time, I was back in my pre pregnancy clothes, wearing size 10 jeans. I was happy, but this didn't last. Why? Because I got lazy. Who wants to count points when you have a toddler to run after?
Moving to France, where I forced myself to cook with fresh vegetables every day rather than some days a week, and I had to walk around everywhere, the weight began to peel away again. I was determined to keep losing weight, after I'd had such a success with Weight Watchers, years before. I started eating portions and with the walking, soon enough, I was losing weight. Until I got pregnant.
I stopped cycling, because I had no balance, but I made a conscious decision, since I was 35, that I didn't want to indulge, or rather over indulge, because of the complications that could arise from my age. I ate clean for 9 months, and my midwives were surprised that I'd only put on baby weight. Roughly around 20 lbs.
Forward to 2015, I've been here in the US since 2011. I blame myself for the massive weight gain of course. When we arrived in the states, I was a size 12. I was walking as much as I could under the hellish sun in Tampa. However, I started to over indulge. EVERYTHING was appealing. Even things I knew that weren't good for me. I went from a size 12 to a size 22 in pants.
|March 2011, England|
When my weight ballooned, it wasn't overnight, but it seemed like it to me, as I was in denial. The more people pointed out my weight, the more I ate, the more I said fuck it, and had a tub of ice cream, or ate almost an entire pizza on my own, because I didn't care. Why were they bugging me? I just had a child. I was tired, I was back in a place, where I knew, as I'd lived in Tampa before, my mother and aunt were near by, but I 'd lost my independence.
Now I had to rely on someone driving me somewhere, because yes, I don't' drive. All the times that I took my children with me on the trains, the times the eldest and I would go for days out and picnics was now gone. And that infuriated me as much as my overeating, which ended up in a vicious cycle.
I started exercising after I saw this picture. I thought if I started to move around and skipped meals I would be fine. The truth is that my weight increased even more.
By the time my 40th rolled up, I lost track of how bit I was, because I didn't want to face the scale. I wondered what to do. I tried exercising again, and ended up on a losing battle. I would lose five pounds, and then gain 7 or 8. Until I started dealing with Beachbody work outs.
My disclaimer is this: I'm not a coach, and I don't drink Shakeology because I have many food allergies. What I'm going to say is something that comes from the heart and I am not getting paid to talk about this.
After that I tried T25. I could see the results, the weight was coming off, and then I stopped. I was becoming a serial quitter. Until I found PiYo.
I'd tried Turbo Fire, another one of Chalene's programs. I have to say that I hated it, and Only did one day of it, before quitting. However, after watching PiYo videos on Youtube, I convinced myself that i could do it. The first time I did it, I saw the results quickly, and I was happy with it. However, I soon fell off the wagon.
If I'd continued with PiYo I would have been closer to my weight goal, but I didn't. I stopped and over the summer my weight went up. After a health scare in August, I talked myself into picking PiYo again. I was expecting to fail once more. However, here we are six weeks in.
|First Day of PiYo|
|Last day of the First Month of PiYo|